Monday, September 14, 2009
Too much?
Maybe I'm having a case of the Mondays but I am feeling slightly overwhelmed right now. I think I officially live a life of excess and need to simplify things. I eat too much, drink too much, bitch too much, smoke too much, spend too much, worry too much and the list goes on. How to simplify my life? As I am a chronic yo-yo dieter I thought to myself this morning I should quit smoking and start dieting again. The panic this thought caused, made me immediately run to Casey's for another pack of smokes and while waiting in line my mouth began to water as I dreamed of a gondola with doritos on top.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
From an e-mail making it's rounds.....
RANDOM THOUGHTS…..
-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves
me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.
-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
-That's enough, Nickelback.
-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
-The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This
recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never
be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
-There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first
saw it.
-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.
-How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
-I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
-A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
-Was learning cursive really necessary?
-LOL has gone from meaning ‘laugh out loud’ to ‘I have nothing else to say’.
-I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
-Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.
-My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired
about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us."
Classy, bro.
-Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all
I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
-How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
-I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
-While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
-MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.
-Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
-I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.
-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.
-Bad decisions make good stories
-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!
-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would
probably just be completely invisible.
-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name
And where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? I know my name, I know where
I’m from- this shouldn’t be a problem…
-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made
Up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.
-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.
-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching
TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge
me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching
this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the
room. Will we still be friends after this?'
-While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of
Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don’t win, they are executed.
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?
-I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing
anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.
-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...
-As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not
know what time it is.
-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.
-I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I
find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from
th e fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.
-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the
link takes me to a video instead of text.
-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.
-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think
about it, and20then estimate d that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by
myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard
before dinner.
-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves
me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.
-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
-That's enough, Nickelback.
-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
-The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This
recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never
be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
-There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first
saw it.
-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.
-How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
-I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
-A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
-Was learning cursive really necessary?
-LOL has gone from meaning ‘laugh out loud’ to ‘I have nothing else to say’.
-I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
-Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.
-My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired
about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us."
Classy, bro.
-Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all
I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
-How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
-I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
-While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
-MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.
-Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
-I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.
-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.
-Bad decisions make good stories
-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!
-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would
probably just be completely invisible.
-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name
And where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? I know my name, I know where
I’m from- this shouldn’t be a problem…
-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made
Up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.
-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.
-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching
TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge
me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching
this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the
room. Will we still be friends after this?'
-While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of
Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don’t win, they are executed.
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?
-I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing
anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.
-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...
-As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not
know what time it is.
-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.
-I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I
find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from
th e fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.
-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the
link takes me to a video instead of text.
-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.
-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think
about it, and20then estimate d that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by
myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard
before dinner.
The Randomness That Is My Life
I started this blog to talk about all things food. But lately nothing foody has made me passionate so I'm changing the theme of the blog slightly. I will now be talking about all things I find in life that appeal to me. Randomness that is my mom Judy, food, work woes, reposts from other people and other randomness that is my life. I have a feeling no one even reads this anymore since I haven't updated it in almost 2 months....but thought an explanation might be necessary.
For my first post with the new theme I am sharing my own random thoughts/stories:
-My mom wants to set me up with a one-legged, motivational speaker.
-I once surprised a boyfriend whom I had just reconciled with repeatedly, by taking him to Myrtle Beach for 24 hours for Valentine's Day to prove to him I was really committed this time. I broke up with him on the plane ride home.
-I asked a guy I was recently "talking to" what kind of music he was in to. He said he wasn't really into music. We never saw each other again.
More to come.....
For my first post with the new theme I am sharing my own random thoughts/stories:
-My mom wants to set me up with a one-legged, motivational speaker.
-I once surprised a boyfriend whom I had just reconciled with repeatedly, by taking him to Myrtle Beach for 24 hours for Valentine's Day to prove to him I was really committed this time. I broke up with him on the plane ride home.
-I asked a guy I was recently "talking to" what kind of music he was in to. He said he wasn't really into music. We never saw each other again.
More to come.....
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Frisco Melt
Steak N Shake's frisco melt is hands down the best post bar food on the planet. The description from their website is the following: Two Steakburgers with American and Swiss cheeses, on buttery grilled sourdough with our sweet 'n tangy Frisco sauce. Additional cost for bacon, WAIT A SECOND. I could have been getting bacon?!
Anyways, the frisco melt is AMAZING, this is not up for debate.
This morning when I woke up, I decided I would find out exactly how bad it really was for you. I mean, I was probably making it much worse in my head, trying to calculate the weight watchers points right? I tend to be an overestimator. I go to the Steak N Shake website. It says they currently working to improve and review their nutrtional information. So I venture over to calorieking.com and type in Steak N Shake. I find the frisco melt. Are you sitting down? 980 calories and 72 grams of fat. Oh yeah, and 0 fiber. Yes, the calories is mind blowing but the fat grams. Are you shitting me? Really? Did they inject it with extra fat somehow? It doesn't even seem big enough to hold that many fat grams (the picture above is misleading, it doesn't look that big when you actually get it). For those of you who count points, that is 26 points. More than my entire allotment of points for an entire day. Yowza Steak N Shake, yowza.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Exercise Is Bad for Your Health
Well, your mental health anyways. I joined Cardinal Fitness yesterday. I came to the realization that I shouldn't be sore the next day after running to 2 bases during rec league softball.
When I work out, it's just me, my iPod, and my thoughts. If it's a good song on the iPod, for instance, the Black Eyed Peas "Boom Boom Pow", while using the elliptical, I imagine myself in a boxing gym in a montage of sorts. You know, doing some punches, kicks, something that resembles a karate chop with dimmed lights. It's intense. Then there are times where I just bounce from thought to thought. I talked to my step sister Laura yesterday for close to 40 minutes. She asked how long Marc and I had been together. I told her it had been a year in April. Her response, "WOW, that's a long time for you." She's right. That is a long time for me. Then I started thinking about boys I had lived with in the past and came to the realization that 3 of the 4 are engaged or married, 1 I lost track of, but last I heard, had a baby on the way. And then there was another realization. In all these cases, the girls they are married to/are marrying is the girl they dated right after me. I never saw Good Luck Chuck, but I'm pretty sure I'm the live version. Has anyone see this? After all is said and done is Chuck ok?
So yeah, working out is bad for your health. Apparently I need to get more critically acclaimed music like the Black Eyed Peas so my mind stays in the boxing montage.
When I work out, it's just me, my iPod, and my thoughts. If it's a good song on the iPod, for instance, the Black Eyed Peas "Boom Boom Pow", while using the elliptical, I imagine myself in a boxing gym in a montage of sorts. You know, doing some punches, kicks, something that resembles a karate chop with dimmed lights. It's intense. Then there are times where I just bounce from thought to thought. I talked to my step sister Laura yesterday for close to 40 minutes. She asked how long Marc and I had been together. I told her it had been a year in April. Her response, "WOW, that's a long time for you." She's right. That is a long time for me. Then I started thinking about boys I had lived with in the past and came to the realization that 3 of the 4 are engaged or married, 1 I lost track of, but last I heard, had a baby on the way. And then there was another realization. In all these cases, the girls they are married to/are marrying is the girl they dated right after me. I never saw Good Luck Chuck, but I'm pretty sure I'm the live version. Has anyone see this? After all is said and done is Chuck ok?
So yeah, working out is bad for your health. Apparently I need to get more critically acclaimed music like the Black Eyed Peas so my mind stays in the boxing montage.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Some Things Never Change
Even though I canceled my Weight Watchers subscription back in May, I am still getting their weekly e-mail that reminds me "I don't have to do it alone" or "Get back on the bandwagon NOW". Well, today I was ready to give into the harassment and sign back up for Weight Watchers online. In all the e-mails it said they would waive my registration fee. Good enough for me. So I click the link and in the payment section it does not waive my fee. Hmm. So I contact customer service and explain the problem. They respond that if the offer does not show up I must not be within 6 months of my original cancellation. I next visit Chase's website. Sure enough, weight watchers had debited $16.95 from my account in May...that's within 6 months right? Perhaps I have ignored the more important phrase, original cancellation. If you want to get technical weight watchers online, I originally canceled you back in 2004. I signed up for the first time in June of 2003. That is a lot of weight watching.
Within this time my life has gone so many different directions. I have graduated college, bought my first business suit, moved to Chicago, moved to Lincoln, and moved back to Bloomington. I have lived with 4 boyfriends and had lots of failed relationships including romantic, friendships, and work-related. I have walked out a job and worked for a man who is now running from the feds and another who would be had he not died. I have gone from 4 nieces and newphews to 10 and have had 3 siblings get married. My life is like Illinois weather, if you don't like it, wait 5 minutes, it will change.
The only thing that seems to have remained constant during this time of never ending change is my worry of weight, or weight watching. While I may have cancelled the service an immeasurable amount of times I never officially quit weight "watching". I wonder if there will ever be a morning I wake up and don't think I should weigh myself, which by the way, a daily weigh-in works 1 of 2 ways. If you like the result it reinforces the good things you've done and encourages you to keep doing them, and if you don't like the number, it reminds you that you can't eat McDonald's for 2 out of 3 of your daily meals and expect not develop that second chin.
I guess there really isn't a point to this blog. I just realized I hadn't blogged for awhile. I also realized that maybe I should expand the horizons of this space to more than just food and weight issues. I can certainly be fired up about more issues than food and weight, although those just seem to be the contants. Maybe I should change the url to www.sarahstopthinking.blogspot.com.
Within this time my life has gone so many different directions. I have graduated college, bought my first business suit, moved to Chicago, moved to Lincoln, and moved back to Bloomington. I have lived with 4 boyfriends and had lots of failed relationships including romantic, friendships, and work-related. I have walked out a job and worked for a man who is now running from the feds and another who would be had he not died. I have gone from 4 nieces and newphews to 10 and have had 3 siblings get married. My life is like Illinois weather, if you don't like it, wait 5 minutes, it will change.
The only thing that seems to have remained constant during this time of never ending change is my worry of weight, or weight watching. While I may have cancelled the service an immeasurable amount of times I never officially quit weight "watching". I wonder if there will ever be a morning I wake up and don't think I should weigh myself, which by the way, a daily weigh-in works 1 of 2 ways. If you like the result it reinforces the good things you've done and encourages you to keep doing them, and if you don't like the number, it reminds you that you can't eat McDonald's for 2 out of 3 of your daily meals and expect not develop that second chin.
I guess there really isn't a point to this blog. I just realized I hadn't blogged for awhile. I also realized that maybe I should expand the horizons of this space to more than just food and weight issues. I can certainly be fired up about more issues than food and weight, although those just seem to be the contants. Maybe I should change the url to www.sarahstopthinking.blogspot.com.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
WWMFD Day #2
Day 2 of trying to be like Megan Fox. So far so good. Basically I was just sick of talking about Weight Watchers. What I'm trying to do is be on Weight Watchers, and if I stay "on plan" then that is Megan Foxesque. Although I have a sneaking suspicion Megan Fox would not eat a handful of seasoned cashews like I did this morning (FYI, the seasoning made them taste like Fritos, can't decide if I liked it or not but I certainly finished the handful).
By the way, tried the new Kentucky Grilled Chicken. I'm kicking myself for not taking a picture of the "wing" that is included with the 2 piece meal. My sides were green beans and corn and I gave the roll to a co-worker. That was a very Megan Fox order in my opinion. The whole thing clocked in at 8 points--not bad. Maybe my new favorite healthy fast food meal?! Next time there will be a picture, because like all fast food items in commercials, items are not as they appear!
By the way, tried the new Kentucky Grilled Chicken. I'm kicking myself for not taking a picture of the "wing" that is included with the 2 piece meal. My sides were green beans and corn and I gave the roll to a co-worker. That was a very Megan Fox order in my opinion. The whole thing clocked in at 8 points--not bad. Maybe my new favorite healthy fast food meal?! Next time there will be a picture, because like all fast food items in commercials, items are not as they appear!
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Operation Megan Fox
I apologize for my long blog absence. There is no excuse. I just haven't had anything to inspire me to write lately. However, I am VERY upset with TGIFriday's for getting rid of Fried Mac N' Cheese. If you're just as upset as me, let them know. http://www.tgifridays.com/contactUs/contactForm.aspx
Anyways, I realize that despite the fact that I signed up for Weight Watchers AGAIN (Seriously this is about the 30th time--at least) I keep getting more and more fat. I think I'm developing back boobs and I cringe when I look at pictures. Not good. A trick they teach at weight watchers is to keep a picture of yourself at your heaviest weight in your wallet or on your fridge so when it comes to making a food decision, you remind yourself what you're work for (or against). I am going to tweak this theory. I am calling my plan Operation Megan Fox. I will print several pictures of her and place them on my fridge, in the car (you know for guidance in the drive-thru), at my work desk, and anywhere else I get urges to eat food that is not going to help me get to my goals. I guess if I'm trying to cover everywhere I should just get her tattooed to the back of my eyelids. Is anywhere really safe?
Anyways, I realize that despite the fact that I signed up for Weight Watchers AGAIN (Seriously this is about the 30th time--at least) I keep getting more and more fat. I think I'm developing back boobs and I cringe when I look at pictures. Not good. A trick they teach at weight watchers is to keep a picture of yourself at your heaviest weight in your wallet or on your fridge so when it comes to making a food decision, you remind yourself what you're work for (or against). I am going to tweak this theory. I am calling my plan Operation Megan Fox. I will print several pictures of her and place them on my fridge, in the car (you know for guidance in the drive-thru), at my work desk, and anywhere else I get urges to eat food that is not going to help me get to my goals. I guess if I'm trying to cover everywhere I should just get her tattooed to the back of my eyelids. Is anywhere really safe?
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Going out with a bang.
I'm starting Weight Watchers again tomorrow. I feel fat. Hugely fat. I feel like my thighs get caught on each other while trying to move at times. Back to Weight Watchers I go. However, today I've decided I'm eating all the bad leftovers in my fridge. It's before 10:30 AM and I've already had my left over Naked Nachos from Carlos O'Kelly's last night, a slice of Casey's Sausage pizza and polished it off with a chocolate cupcake for good measure. My pants feel tight. My arms feel like sausage links and my face feels puffy. Grosssssssss
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Thanks Mom
Judy just introduced me to something delicious. Dipping fritos into cottage cheese. Awe-some!
Side note, garlic and herb flavor Wheat Thins are terrible. Skip them.
Side note, garlic and herb flavor Wheat Thins are terrible. Skip them.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Really Taco Bell?
The old saying is "If it seems to good to be true, it probably is." 79 cent 3 layered nachos from Taco Bell are no different. Bogus. (I added the bottle of lotion for size comparison.)
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Break-Up Diet
I'm finally having a Subway sandwich after not eating anything for 22 hours. It's funny how breaking up with someone makes one forget to eat. How do you forget to eat? My hunger finally caught up with me circa lunchtime today. I had visions of Steak N Shake taco salad or a Culver's burger basket and then I imagined myself 200 lbs and running into Marc, Subway it is.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Oh yeah
And Day 3 of no soda was the last day for that business. Whoever came up with the addictive qualities of soda (and nicotine for that matter) and then unleashed them on the world should be tarred and feathered. Seriously, pour hot tar on them and then feather them, everyday, for the rest of their lives.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Food as function
It's now almost the end of Day 2 with no soda. I am feeling like a crack head going through withdrawal. I have headaches, I'm irritable (sorry Marc), I'm twitchy and for some reason I'm touching my face a lot. You'd think I was giving up smoking or something. Tonight I ate at Mugsy's. Cheeseburger and fries. It just wasn't the same without my friend soda. On the way home it hit me. Eating is no longer the celebration it once was. The joy is gone. Eating has now sort of become a function rather than fun. I guess that is what food was intended for all along....a way to keep your body fueled to perform it's required tasks. Something about this loss of joy feels wrong though. Almost evil and torturous. Which makes me wonder....do I fall off course? For now I power on. I'm hoping one day to look back on these thoughts and see how silly I once was for thinking pop could make such a difference in my life. Well, it'll either be that or tomorrow I'll re-read this while holding a Diet Dr. Pepper. It's a toss up.
8.9 lbs away
I plan to weigh myself everyday. Yeah, I know, that's not good for your psyche but I don't care. As soon as that scale reads that magical number, I am booking a trip! Now even though it says I am 8.9 lbs away, I did lose more than 1.1 lbs overnight....3.2 to be exact. Really my goal was to lose 10 lbs from my unacceptable weight. You know what would make all this numbers game easier to understand? if I just came out and posted my weight. But I refuse. I am not ready for the judgment that comes with that number quite yet. Perhaps as I get closer to my goal, actual weights will be revealed. Today is not that day.
It's Day #2 no diet soda. I thought on my way to work today I should stop and get some crackers and a diet dr. pepper (the most superior of all diet sodas). And then I realized I wasn't doing that anymore. I felt pangs of anger and sadness and then I remembered this was my decision. I got some Raisin Bran and skim milk instead. Stupid milk, you don't make a cool sound when I open you.
On a completely different note, I was recently introduced to the music stylings of Adele and I'm loving it. You should check her out if you haven't already. I am currently rocking her station on Pandora and it's making for a lovely day at work. Adele, Corrine Bailey Rae, Sara Bareilles, Feist, ahh I'm happy.
It's Day #2 no diet soda. I thought on my way to work today I should stop and get some crackers and a diet dr. pepper (the most superior of all diet sodas). And then I realized I wasn't doing that anymore. I felt pangs of anger and sadness and then I remembered this was my decision. I got some Raisin Bran and skim milk instead. Stupid milk, you don't make a cool sound when I open you.
On a completely different note, I was recently introduced to the music stylings of Adele and I'm loving it. You should check her out if you haven't already. I am currently rocking her station on Pandora and it's making for a lovely day at work. Adele, Corrine Bailey Rae, Sara Bareilles, Feist, ahh I'm happy.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
R.I.P. Diet Soda......10 lbs to Puerto Rico
I got on the scale this morning. Once again over my "unacceptable" weight. It might have had something to do with the fact I ate so much Rosatti's Chicago Style deep dish last night I wanted to puke and then pass out. I was uncomfortably full and still trying to shovel bites in my mouth. What is wrong with me? Anyways, I woke up this morning and did my usual "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH" speech to myself. Then it hit me. I really, really enjoy food with soda. Sometimes I think I cannot eat something unless I have a soda with it. I drink soda with breakfast food even. I have always thought this an ok practice since I only drink diet soda. Diet soda has 0 calories, so what harm am I doing (keep in mind, I care nothing about the fact that soda eats away tooth enamel, etc--I only care if it will make me fat)?
So that's what I'm going to try to do....cut out the diet soda. I am already certain the act of eating will lose all joy. There is something magical about washing down a mouthful of Mexican food with a crispy, tingling, cold, refreshing diet soda. I am really sad just thinking about it. I would like to put a disclaimer on this--the idea is only about 5 hours old so if you see me drinking a soda, do not be surprised. I reserve the right to back out of this at any time. For now though, I think it will be effective in dropping some lbs.
I also have decided the second I lose 10 lbs, I will be booking a tropical vaca with Ms. Fine. I cannot wait. Peurto Rico perhaps? We both have credits for a free one way from Ghettotran so we need to go somewhere they fly. They have traded their Bahamas service for Puerto Rico, so it's looking like a definite possibility. Now it's just these pesky 10 lbs I must drop before I can book. Hopefully we'll make it there before the end of the year--just kidding Jess--hopefully it won't take that long! Maybe I'll use some of my tax return $$ for a few personal training sessions? Until next time folks......
So that's what I'm going to try to do....cut out the diet soda. I am already certain the act of eating will lose all joy. There is something magical about washing down a mouthful of Mexican food with a crispy, tingling, cold, refreshing diet soda. I am really sad just thinking about it. I would like to put a disclaimer on this--the idea is only about 5 hours old so if you see me drinking a soda, do not be surprised. I reserve the right to back out of this at any time. For now though, I think it will be effective in dropping some lbs.
I also have decided the second I lose 10 lbs, I will be booking a tropical vaca with Ms. Fine. I cannot wait. Peurto Rico perhaps? We both have credits for a free one way from Ghettotran so we need to go somewhere they fly. They have traded their Bahamas service for Puerto Rico, so it's looking like a definite possibility. Now it's just these pesky 10 lbs I must drop before I can book. Hopefully we'll make it there before the end of the year--just kidding Jess--hopefully it won't take that long! Maybe I'll use some of my tax return $$ for a few personal training sessions? Until next time folks......
Monday, January 19, 2009
You are fat, not handicapped.
Background information, I take a guy named Ed out to do things like plays, movies, music events, etc. Ed is an elderly gentlemen who had a rock climbing accident in his 20s causing a brain injury which effects his speech and short term memory. He also has mobility issues and uses a wheelchair for most outings. This is also a good time to note the benefits of helmet use.
Ed wanted to go to an ISU basketball game yesterday. We got there a few minutes before the game began and found our section. Now, even though our tickets had a section, row and seat number, there was no room for us. The handicapped section is basically an open spot at the top of a lower bowl area where those in wheelchairs or who have a handicap sit in red chairs (I assume this includes anyone who could not maneuver stairs). There were about 20 people in this section, Ed was the only one in a wheelchair. There is no way all these folks were handicapped. There were some oldies but the majority of them were just fatties. Now, I didn't care if I could not sit with him as long as there was a spot for him where he could see the game. I asked the usher if there was another handicapped section and he said no but he'd get me a chair. Umm, that doesn't fix the problem. The 16 year old kid with an awesome seat who was very much not handicap should have moved. Eventually someone noticed our plight and gave up their seat which was really nice. What is wrong with some people. Just because you chose to ate yourself wider than the regular seat available at the game doesn't mean you should get preference over the guy who is actually in a wheelchair you selfish asshole. You are fat, not handicapped. Maybe if you played more basketball instead of watching it with a giant bucket of popcorn polished off with a platter of nachos there would be better seats for my friend Ed. Today is a holiday so ISU is closed, but someone at ISU will be getting a call tomorrow.
Ed wanted to go to an ISU basketball game yesterday. We got there a few minutes before the game began and found our section. Now, even though our tickets had a section, row and seat number, there was no room for us. The handicapped section is basically an open spot at the top of a lower bowl area where those in wheelchairs or who have a handicap sit in red chairs (I assume this includes anyone who could not maneuver stairs). There were about 20 people in this section, Ed was the only one in a wheelchair. There is no way all these folks were handicapped. There were some oldies but the majority of them were just fatties. Now, I didn't care if I could not sit with him as long as there was a spot for him where he could see the game. I asked the usher if there was another handicapped section and he said no but he'd get me a chair. Umm, that doesn't fix the problem. The 16 year old kid with an awesome seat who was very much not handicap should have moved. Eventually someone noticed our plight and gave up their seat which was really nice. What is wrong with some people. Just because you chose to ate yourself wider than the regular seat available at the game doesn't mean you should get preference over the guy who is actually in a wheelchair you selfish asshole. You are fat, not handicapped. Maybe if you played more basketball instead of watching it with a giant bucket of popcorn polished off with a platter of nachos there would be better seats for my friend Ed. Today is a holiday so ISU is closed, but someone at ISU will be getting a call tomorrow.
Why so serious?
I have been told by people that they were afraid of me in high school. I didn't slam people into lockers so I wondered why this was. Turns out, I always "looked" mad. Yes, my natural expression is a frown. Now, it didn't occur to me until yesterday why this was the case. I have really chubby cheeks. Like REAL chubby. Do you know how much work it takes to smile and hoist those bad boys up? Maybe that is why people are always saying fat people just plain look unhappy. All that weight from their cheeks is causing a natural frown. Seriously, right now as you are reading this do a big ole teeth bearing smile...I'll wait, do it. Now, if you have chubby cheeks that took a lot out of you huh? I would like you to spend the next week observing people's natural expressions....the fatties are all frowning aren't they?! Please report back with findings.
Daily Rant
My Chase rewards card has a catalog of things you can earn once you've collected enough points. I have now earned enough for a $50 Spa Finder giftcard. I went to Spa Finder's website and the only spa in the area that was listed was Contours Day Spa. I called them just to make sure they did accept them before I ordered it. The woman said they did in fact accept them but they lose money on them so it would be better for them if I just got a gift certificate through their website (I already told her I was buying the Spa Finder one with rewards points, not money, why would I want to spend money on their site when I can get a $50 Spa Finder card for free?). If they don't like accepting Spa Finder giftcards, why don't they stop accepting them instead of complaining about it to potential clients? That made 0 sense to me. I think I will just pony up the money to get myself a massage somewhere else and pick out another item from the rewards catalog. Awesome way to lose business Contours!
Monday, January 12, 2009
I did it!
Yesterday after Bootcamp class, it was official, I made it to all 5 classes I signed up for last week. There was a close call on Thursday where I almost missed kickboxing due to the inability to move everything below my waist, (and wanting to drink) but I miraculously made it through. I'm proud today. Also, if I make it through today, this will be the first time in I don't know how long that I will have stayed totally within my points limits for the week. Normally I blow it during the weekend, but not this week. Now, let's just hope the scale rewards my hard work tomorrow. I should probably get the dream of losing 15 lbs in one week like they do in Biggest Loser out of my head though.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
E-Mail to Taylor Cottone dated 1/8/09
Bootcamp was terrible, which I guess means it was a good workout. We did squats forever. My butt hurts today. I couldn't keep up with all the core work which didn't surprise me but it was disheartening to see the 40 and 50 somethings holding their planks and me laying on my mat panting for breath.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Notes from 2009
Welcome to the New Year everyone. I have decided not to make any New Year's resolutions as that is the quickest way for me to ensure they do not happen. Something about the pressure--I crack. I have decided that I will try to work on being nicer to myself. I will try not to be so judgmental towards my body and be more forgiving when I don't succeed at weight watchers, etc. I have come to the realization though, I am getting older. Now would be the time of my life to have a banging body. I don't want to be 50 and realize that I'm in the best shape of my life. I want to be 50 and look back and want to give a limb for my 20 something body. I better be careful what I wish for, maybe it will be far worse in my 50s and I will give a limb for this body. Got to love perspective.
So anyways, I have signed up for my 4 Seasons classes this "term". I am taking one spin, 2 boot camp and 2 cardio kick. Last night was my first class. Spinning with Jerry. I love Jerry. He's like an ex-hippie who loves techno. Spinning was good but I'm afraid my vagina is now numb and my butt is sore from sitting for 40 minutes on a seat that is designed for a 4 year old. Perhaps I should look into some padded biker shorts OR work on decreasing the mass of flesh known as my ass. It's good to have goals.
So anyways, I have signed up for my 4 Seasons classes this "term". I am taking one spin, 2 boot camp and 2 cardio kick. Last night was my first class. Spinning with Jerry. I love Jerry. He's like an ex-hippie who loves techno. Spinning was good but I'm afraid my vagina is now numb and my butt is sore from sitting for 40 minutes on a seat that is designed for a 4 year old. Perhaps I should look into some padded biker shorts OR work on decreasing the mass of flesh known as my ass. It's good to have goals.
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